I know everyone around me feels the same way, there are not enough hours in a day, not enough days in a week and not enough weeks in a year. Or at least you think about time as something you don’t ever have enough of….I’ve been struggling….A….LOT
The work life balance is something that I’ve been struggling with quite a bit lately, I’d say for six months now it’s been nagging at me a lot. I work a lot and even putting in as many hours as I do I still consider myself a stay at home mom and not a work at home mom. The reality has become I’m a work at home mom. I look around my house and see disaster everywhere. I’ve never been very good at cleaning, and to tell you the truth it doesn’t bother me enough to do anything about it. My house is messy, I’d rather spend the time with my kids, than have a clean house. So I suppose I shouldn’t be so hard on myself with my time management, but still, I feel like I don’t give enough time to my kids.
It’s hard to sit down and write personal posts lately because things aren’t all rosy or I don’t have a really sweet story to tell about my kids right now. All I have are my own struggles. My mind has been clouded lately with them, depression, and anxiety. My reviews have been negative lately, even when I love the product, and I’ve been trying to give most of the reviews to my contributors so I can have more time with my kids and to deal with my depression and anxiety. I’m even seeing a doctor who’s trying to help me work through all of it. It’s still somehow not working.
Maybe it’s just the clouds and rain and constant overcast that’s talking right now. Because a few weeks ago I was feeling like things were going pretty well. Today all I want to do is take a nap but I hate leaving the blog empty for more than one day, I hate leaving it empty for one day even. Sundays I’ve had no time at all for blogging. Two weeks in a row I was in my house less than 30 minutes between 8:30 AM and 9:00 PM on Sunday, it was lucky that last week I had a post scheduled but this week I didn’t. Last Sunday was my stepmom’s birthday and I forgot to call her. I was so busy, and still I felt guilty so I called her the next day and in my guilt I was frustrated and my conversation didn’t go well. which added to my blah! Other things happened this week that made me more blah! And today I have no motivation. Blah, that’s what I wanted to title this post. Blah has been my mood for about five days now. Blah….I’m going to go take that nap and wake up with a new attitude. And get some better content for you guys!