parenting — MomStart

Remember the Sunscreen! Even for Back to School

August 24, 2010 By Momstart 5 Comments

I was sent an article about sunscreen and how important it is to use every day. Not just during the summer while you are at the pool. In fact, my doctor has been telling me for a few years now that I should not leave the house without putting on the sunscreen and I hate when I forget. I have so many moles and all of my moles are abnormal. When I went to the dermatologist last time she said, wow, they all look bad, so we’ll just take a few and see how they are and then decide if we should take more, ummm. Are you serious? I feel like I’m playing Russian Roulette with my skin. So I want to make sure you guys remember to put the sunscreen on yourselves and your children.

Going Back to school tips:

Data suggests that the majority of sun exposure in a person’s like occurs before the age of 18. So… how can you be sure to protect your children when they are back at school and out of your sight? Kavita Mariwalla, MD, Director of Mohs and Dermatologic Surgery at St. Luke’s-Roosevelt and Beth Israel Medical Centers, suggests following these simple rules:

Use the spray version 30 minutes before a sport activity they are part of

Wash your children’s clothing with a sunscreen additive like Rit Sunguard. (I’ve never heard of that stuff before but it sounds really cool). The easy to use powder can be washed in with clothes in the laundry and confers added SPF to t-shirts, shorts and socks – good for multiple washes.

Purchase empty lotion bottles or re-use them when they are empty (travel size) and put sunscreen in them and send them to school with your children.

Make sure your kids are wearing sunglasses and protecting their eyes.

Making wearing hats fun for your kids. Hats provided added protection to children’s scalps, necks and faces. Make sure to use sunscreen anyways, but this added protection will help.

When your child is in an all day event like a tournament, designate a parent to be the sunscreen mom, you know, like snack mom. That way all the kids will be taken care of and protected from the sun!

This information was provided to me by respected PR rep that I work with. I was not compensated, I just feel it’s important to share because I have experience with the sun and skin damage. Only time will tell for me how bad the damage is!

Filed Under: Announcement, parenting, personal Tagged With: Rit Sunguard, Sun Block, sunscreen

What do you do when your child wants to go on the naughty spot?

July 28, 2010 By Momstart 14 Comments

Perhaps our mistake is that we give Zoe a warning, “Do you want to go on the naughty spot"?” when she is doing something that we are not very happy with. Let’s say, I just asked her to wipe her face and hands after dinner before she gets down to get everything sticky. She says

“No, I won’t”

So, I say, “do you want to go on the naughty spot”

She says, “Yes, I want to go on the naughty spot”

First I’m in shock, she wants to go on the naughty spot. Hmmm, does that mean I need to come up with a new punishment. I am not fond of spanking and pretty sure what just transpired does not even deserve a spanking, that’s for very serious offenses.

She is only three so is her brain capable of trying reverse psychology on me? Is she really trying to keep herself off of the naughty spot by saying she wants to go? So I’ve decided to say, fine, and be very very serious.

I put her on the naughty spot and tell her, “You are on the naughty spot because you were not listening to mommy”

Then when she gets off she’s a good girl. So no matter how her brain is working the naughty spot is still helping change her attitude. I do have very good kids.

You know, she does the same thing when she’s tired. She always tells me that she needs a nap and if I don’t listen to her she has a meltdown. It’s like she just knows she can’t handle the rest of the day unless she gets her nap, I just hate putting her down at 11 or earlier because then our afternoon will just drag on and on and on.

What does your child do?

Filed Under: parenting, personal Tagged With: naughty spot

Relationship Trumps All

June 21, 2010 By Momstart 10 Comments

I recently attended a meeting about cyber bullying, and keeping your kids safe on-line. It was presented by a company called schakra local to Redmond WA. They have developed a new program that can help parents monitor their child’s use of social media, gogostat parental guidance. It made me realize a lot about keeping children safe on-line and brought up quite a few valid points that even I had never considered.

Protecting your children can be a very difficult job from day one. First when they are born they can’t do anything on their own. They seem so breakable and yet they bring you the greatest kind of joy you will ever know. Then they get a little bit older, like my son and they are the most accident prone creatures you have ever seen. Always getting boo boos and watching them get hurt, grow and explore sometimes breaks your heart. All you want to do is keep them safe and protect them but you have to let them grow.

As they grow they become individuals and need us less and less. We get ready to send them to school and out of our eagle site every day. The discussion of strangers should be embedded in their brains by now, and they know not to ever leave or even talk to someone they do not know. Have you ever thought about discussing how strangers on-line relates to strangers in person?

I know that I have received many invitations to check out on-line sites geared towards children. My kids are young, but there are sites that they can go to and make on-line friends but how safe is that? It’s not safe at all. People can sign up for these sites no matter what their age and lie about who they are. Predators target these sites. There are no fail safes for this. You as a parent are the only fail safe. You can protect your children by making sure your kids only friend people they know in real life. If you begin this lesson with smaller websites then when they move to facebook or any form of social media it will be easier to maintain the same rule. Teach them that the number of friends they have on-line is not a status symbol. Looking at my own friends on facebook, I think I need to re-examine my own lists.

A common misconception of the internet is that it is a safe place to hang out, pretend to be someone else, or share information about yourself.

Children believe that on-line isn’t real. They think it is a place where they can hide behind an avatar and do whatever they want or say whatever they want. They think they are safe and that no one will find out who they really are, but it is not true. The internet is a very dangerous place and traceable. I don’t even think that most adults realize that after something is posted on-line (photos or words) it can not be un-done. Yes you can delete it but it is still there and it is always there (difficult to find but yes still there nonetheless). Think twice before posting. Educate yourself as a parent. Learn about websites, social media or anything that your child has an interest in.

How does Gogostat help?

Gogostat works on the basis that you have a strong relationship with your child. “Relationship trumps all”

Gogostat Parental Guidance allows you to monitor key words and phrases that might be bad in applications that your child uses on-line. It also sends you an alert if one of their friends posts a photo of your child. I mean, it only works if you know what sites your child is using and their account name. Then you can tell your child what is appropriate and what is not. You can tell them to tell their friend to take down that photo of them if you feel it is inappropriate. It is an application that helps good kids stay out of trouble and safe. Peer pressure is strong and on-line peer pressure works the same way. Let them hide behind you and use you as a reason to keep all information on-line to a minimum and age appropriate.

The best way to protect them

Be sure to keep up a line of communication with your children throughout their lives. You have to be able to talk to them about anything and make them feel that they have no reason to hide anything from you. I know this isn’t easy and you won’t always be liked. Being a parent is not about your children liking you. It’s about loving them and putting their safety above all else.

Educate yourself
Educate your children
Always Know what they are doing On-line and Off

Filed Under: parenting, personal, review Tagged With: gogostat, on-line safety, protecting your children

Still a Family A guide to parenting through divorce giveaway.

March 17, 2009 By Momstart 24 Comments

I had the chance to read Still a Family A guide to parenting through divorce and want to give my book to one of my readers. I am not divorced and I have no plans to get a divorce. I grew up in a family that was divorced. My mom has been divorced twice and lived with a man for a few years, so I know all about heart ache, feeling pulled in one direction or another by a parent.

I was too young when my parents got divorced for them to try and sit down and explain it to me, but I was old enough to realize they were arguing A LOT. I remember one time I started crying because of something on tv and they started arguing over who made me cry. That made me cry harder.

I find that Lisa discusses topics that are important to all parents. How does arguing in front of your children affect your kids and taking time for yourself. We all need to do that. My parents also used me as the go between. Good grief there was a lot of tension in my family. Now I find myself being the most passive, not wanting to get into an argument person there is. I just give in. That’s me.

I also find that you should not talk about about the other parent in front of your child. It is more important to teach your children love and respect than hatred and anger. I often wonder how I came out the way I did. Anyways this is a good book.

Book Description from Amazon:

Book Description: from Amazon

Divorce can have a devastating effect on children. Yet for families who carefully consider and manage the intricacies associated with this difficult and upsetting time, the family, as seen from the child’s perspective, can remain strong, healthy, and as loving and supportive as it ever was.

Still a Family clearly and concisely lays out the specific emotions and reactions parents need to anticipate from their children while going through separation, divorce, and its aftermath. Rather than weighing parents down with complicated plans, confusing information, and legal terminology, this book takes a common-sense approach, providing readers in a state of emotional distress with the practical, down-to-earth advice they need to sensibly and comfortingly guide their children through this often painful process. The book covers the most common mistakes divorcing parents tend to make, as well as addressing special issues that come up for kids of different age groups. This is a much-needed repository of wisdom and practical counsel for any family going through a time of heightened feelings and fragile relationships.

Dr. Reynolds is a marriage and family therapist who teaches a mandatory class for all divorcing parents through the Connecticut Council of Family Service Agencies. She knows her topic well, and she presents her material in a reader-friendly manner that will appeal to parents from all walks of life

Enter:

Tell me a good parenting tip Giveaway ends March 25, 2009

Filed Under: advice, book review, giveaway, parenting